Tuesday, September 11, 2012

What Does It Mean to Forgive?

This post is a work in progress. The question of forgiveness came up at the ladies prayer breakfast on Saturday, and our assignment for the next month is to try to identify exactly was forgiveness looks like.

*What forgiveness is NOT:
   1.  Forgiveness is not minimizing the other person's sin.
   2.  Forgiveness is not placing yourself as a continual victim of abuse.






*What forgiveness IS:
  1. Letting go of any retaliation or punishment.





*Thoughts:
  1. If I am not at peace but am obsessing about the situation, does this mean that I have not really forgiven him or her?
  2. How do I come to terms with the fact that some people are toxic? Is it possible to forgive the person but keep him or her at a safe distance?

1 comment:

Crosimoto said...

I love "THIS" discussion. Forgiveness is such a big deal that I don't think we can talk enough about it. I also asked the question the last time I was involved in a forgiveness discussion; Do men and women define forgiveness differently? I think so. I define it as "You don't retry the case!"
People say if you don't forget, then you haven't forgiven. I don't believe that simply because I have a memory that's better than most. But I don't retry the case, I don't bring up the offense to levy more punishment or extract more remorse. I also have a hard time with the idea of "casting your pearls before swine" in light of forgiveness and I think you've hit the nail on the head. Some people ARE toxic to you (maybe not to everyone else). Is it the "Christian thing to do" to continue to let them poison you? I don't think so either. I pray about it.
When it comes to the self-check for "Have I forgiven?", I simply ask myself "Does their happiness take away from mine?" If the answer is "No", that's how I really know.